Creepy Wally: I can press into your boundaries, but you can’t press into mine.
On the AskaManager blog, a woman wants to know: is it weird that her boss goes through her notes — and makes corrections — when she steps away from her desk? Even worse, should she be worried when the boss drops things into her purse, without asking first? Nice things, but still, couldn’t she just hand them to her. Creepy!
AskaManager: “This made me feel very uncomfortable, like I don’t have any privacy, if she’s going to be going through all my things. She never told me she would do this or asked my permission – in fact, she made a point of saying, that this is my desk and I can do whatever I want there!”
Creepy Wally: Because You Work For Me, I Have Complete Control Over You
Alison Green answered the question, “It’s weird and boundary-violating. It’s not outrageous-level violating, but it’s definitely off…The bigger issue is whether these are signs that she’s going to be boundary-violating in other ways, so keep your eyes open for that.”
Creepy Wally Attack
I say that’s a Creepy Wally attack from someone who should be trusted, but isn’t. I advise the same as Alison.
Keep your guard up!
If you allow your boss to violate your private space, you’ll end up in deep water, too far from the shore. She is already stepping over good manners and respectful behavior. Where does it end?
Definition: Creepy Wally: when someone is all over you like a cheap suit. Too close for comfort.
After talking to your boss about the situation and how you feel about it, act like a teenager with a secret. Hide your stuff! Lock it away. And stay on guard! This isn’t friendly behavior. It’s creepy. It’s weird and difficult to explain or prove.
Over time, if you let Creepy Wally get too close, nothing will stop her. She will keep pushing to see what your limit is. Low tolerance for that sort of behavior is the only answer. Take action!
Stay tuned for more workplace issues. I’ve become a huge fan of the askamanager blog.
DramaGuru Belt Levels
DramaGuru is a verbal martial art. To learn, start with a white belt post and work your way up the ladder to black belt. Or choose any post, article or project that interests you. There’s always something new to learn. As you feel more confident, you can apply your DramaGuru verbal martial arts skills to situations happening to you.
This post is a white belt DramaGuru lesson. Practice Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) for your mouth.